to exist but not to be seen

sideeffectsinclude:

“You may get well. But you never forget.”

— Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia by Marya Hornbacher

sideeffectsinclude:

“I shrank back from my body as if it were going to devour me.”

— Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia by Marya Hornbacher

sideeffectsinclude:

“I seem to have run in a great circle, and met myself again on the starting line.”

— Jeanette Winterson, Oranges are Not the Only Fruit

heartshop:

One part is the part you’re trying to kill—the weak self, the body. One part is the
part you’re trying to become—the powerful self, the mind. This is not psychosis, this splitting. It is the history of Western culture made manifest. Your ability to withstand pain is your claim to fame. It is ascetic, holy. It is self-control. It is masochism, and masochism is pleasurable to many, but we don’t like to think about that. We don’t like to think that a person could have a twisted autoerotic life going on, be both a top and a bottom, and experience both at once: the
pleasure of beating the hell out of a body shackled at the wrists, and the pleasure of being the body and knowing we deserve each blow.

–– Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

sideeffectsinclude:

“There is great danger in the body.”

— Collected Poems, W.B. Yeats

violentwavesofemotion:

“But now I am all serpent, and I go where serpents go, taking my path,”

— Annie Finch, from Spells: New & Selected Poems; “Lamia to Lycius,”